Take a look at your medicine cabinet\u2014your prescriptions could be behind your lower libido. Aside from birth control pills, common offenders include drugs for high blood pressure, gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD), anxiety, and depression. \u201cIf a medication is the most likely culprit, discuss your concern with the prescribing doctor,\u201d says Dr. Millheiser. \u201cIt\u2019s possible that another treatment may be used with fewer side effects.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Divide household chores equally<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nAfter a long day of work, you may head home for your other full-time job: being a parent. \u201cAfter the kids go to bed, there\u2019s often cleanup followed by work that you\u2019ve brought home,\u201d says Dr. Millheiser. \u201cAs a result, intimacy gets pushed to the background.\u201d If you and your partner are both working full-time, keeping the division of household labor equal and ensuring one partner doesn\u2019t shoulder the whole burden will make both of you happier in the bedroom and out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It\u2019s easy to get in the habit of letting your kids crawl into bed with you after they\u2019ve had a bad dream, or sharing cuddle time with your cat or dog. These are major mood killers, says Dr. Millheiser, who suggests keeping the kiddos and pets out by simply locking the bedroom door at night. It may take some time to break these habits, but making the bed sexy again will make you more relaxed and ready for romance.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Add sex to your to-dos<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nWe schedule doctor\u2019s appointments, work meetings, and drinks with friends\u2014so why not sex? It\u2019s not the most romantic approach, but setting aside a specific time with your significant other means you\u2019re making a commitment to having an active sex life. This way, you\u2019ll feel compelled to keep the appointment and be less likely to make excuses.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Use a lubricant<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nGetting in the mood can be almost impossible if sex is painful for you\u2014but it doesn\u2019t have to be. One of the leading causes is dryness. \u201cIf vaginal dryness is causing pain during intercourse, try using a silicone-based sexual lubricant or a vaginal moisturizer,\u201d suggests Dr. Millheiser. \u201cSilicone lubricants are longer-lasting and more moisturizing than the water-based alternatives. If this doesn\u2019t improve the situation, you may want to check with a gynecologist to see if vaginal estrogen therapy is appropriate.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
De-stress before sex<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nEveryday stressors\u2014your job, your kids\u2019 grades, the leaky bathroom faucet\u2014have a more powerful effect on your sex life than you may realize. Being stressed causes your body to produce more of the \u201cfight or flight\u201d hormone cortisol, which your body needs in small doses but can suppresses the libido when the body produces an excess. Before you hit the sheets, find an easy way to clear your mind, whether it\u2019s taking a long bath or curling up with a good book.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Eat clean<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nFollowing a heart-healthy diet could help you turn up the heat between the sheets. A study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine<\/em> found a link between high cholesterol and women who have difficulty with arousal and orgasm. When cholesterol builds up in the arteries, it makes it harder for blood to flow; in the pelvic area, that can lead to less sensation in the genitals, making it harder to achieve orgasm. Slash your cholesterol levels by loading up on fruits and veggies and cutting down on animal fats and whole-milk products.<\/p>\n\n\n\nEat aphrodisiacs<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nA growing body of research shows that certain vitamins and components can enhance sexual function and desire. Avocados, almonds, strawberries, and oysters are just a few foods that may set the mood.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
A slow sex drive may be a sign of broader relationship problems outside the bedroom. It could be bottled-up resentment over lots of minor issues (he left his toothbrush on the counter again?) or something bigger, like a lack of communication (like too much texting and not enough actual talking, as a recent study examined). \u201cIf the relationship quality needs professional help, find a licensed marriage and family therapist in your area,\u201d advises Dr. Millheiser. \u201cIf the relationship issue pertains only to sex, look for a certified sex therapist.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Go for a hike together<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nOr a run, gym class, cooking seminar\u2014any hobby or interest that you and your partner can do together, suggests Dr. Millheiser. \u201cThis can strengthen your emotional connection, and feelings of support boost desire.\u201d In one study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology<\/em>, couples that engaged in new and exciting activities had greater satisfaction in their relationships. \u201cNew and exciting\u201d is all relative, so depending on how adventurous you are, that could mean anything from trying out mountain biking to skydiving.<\/p>\n\n\n\nExercise often<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nLess stress, an improved mood, and higher self-esteem are all health benefits of exercise\u2014and together they can rev up your sex drive. In fact, a recent study found that women who were taking antidepressants and were experiencing a dulled libido (a common side effect) improved sexual satisfaction by doing three 30-minute sweat sessions per week.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sometimes, a slow sex drive winds up being one symptom of a larger medical problem. So if along with your low libido you begin noticing weight gain, dry skin, hair loss, and fatigue, don\u2019t ignore it\u2014you may be among the 15 million Americans unknowingly suffering from a thyroid problem. A simple blood test will confirm a diagnosis, and it can be treated with medication. Dr. Millheiser warns that low libido is also linked to other medical disorders, including depression and chronic fatigue.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
No dice? Visit your doc<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nIf your engine\u2019s still stalled after these lifestyle tweaks, prescription drugs may help. \u201cCertain medications, such as testosterone or Wellbutrin, can be used on an off-label basis for the treatment of low libido and are only available with a prescription,\u201d Dr. Millheiser says.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
If you\u2019ve lost that frisky feeling, you\u2019re not alone. Research shows that nearly a third of women and 15% of 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