{"id":9969,"date":"2023-05-15T16:53:32","date_gmt":"2023-05-15T16:53:32","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/fitolympia.com\/?p=9969"},"modified":"2023-05-15T16:53:32","modified_gmt":"2023-05-15T16:53:32","slug":"how-to-have-better-sex","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fitolympia.com\/na\/how-to-have-better-sex\/","title":{"rendered":"How to have better sex"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Whether you\u2019ve had more or less sex with your partner during lockdown, these expert-backed tips will help keep the fire alive<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"how<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

For some of us, spending more time with our partners during lockdown has meant more intimacy. Research by the sex toy brand We-Vibe<\/a> found that 18% of live-in couples were having more sex than usual,<\/a> with 16% saying they\u2019d tried new things in the bedroom. On the flip side, a survey by OnBuy <\/a>foundnearly half the couples surveyed were having less sex<\/a> \u2013 41% of women said they weren\u2019t satisfied with their sex lives. So, why is lockdown sex so divisive? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018A lot of people find it hard to feel sexy when they\u2019re worrying about staying safe, or losing their job, or have their kids around,\u2019 explains Samantha Evans, sex and pleasure expert<\/a>. Dating and relationships expert Sarah Louise Ryan<\/a> adds that being with your partner 24\/7 can be an obstacle to desire. \u2018You\u2019re cooped up between four walls and there isn\u2019t much space for excitement or spontaneity,\u2019 she says. \u2018A lot of what drives our sexual desire is the space between us, but now you know what the other person is doing every minute of the day.\u2019 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

But for couples who have found a way to keep sex exciting, its mood-boosting benefits could be a salve for the current climate. \u2018Sex is really good for anxiety relief,\u2019 explains psychologist Emma Kenny<\/a>. \u2018When you have sex, the happy hormones oxytocin and serotonin get released in your brain, lifting your mood and making you feel good.\u2019 So how do we start breaking down those barriers and reap the feel-good benefits? Try these expert-backed tips for better sex. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Rethink what sex means<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

According to experts, our expectations about sex can be enough to put us off doing it. \u2018We build up pictures around what we\u2019re meant to be doing and how we\u2019re meant to be acting,\u2019 explains Kenny. \u2018One thing we try to do in therapy is get people to see that a five-minute quickie is just as important as an hour of drawn-out lovemaking.\u2019 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Evans believes sexual touch can be an important part of intimacy for couples who are feeling tired or stressed. \u2018People might feel they can\u2019t face having full-blown intercourse, but they could try mutual masturbation, or oral sex, or just having a snog,\u2019 she says. \u2018Many couples don\u2019t have penetrative sex, anyway \u2013 it\u2019s about exploring different things. You could just try giving each other an orgasm before you go to sleep.\u2019 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Once you\u2019ve expanded the boundaries of what sex means, it\u2019s easy to start having more of it. \u2018The more sex we have, the more we want,\u2019 explains Ryan. \u2018We get addicted to the feel-good factors.\u2019 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Express yourself<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Good communication is vital if we want our sex life to flourish.\u00a0\u2018One reason your libido might be negatively affected might be a feeling that you and your partner aren\u2019t sharing the load,\u2019 explains Kenny. Whether it\u2019s childcare duties, housework, or financial worries, failing to address an unequal balance in responsibilities can cause sex to dwindle. \u2018When you feel bitter and resentful towards your partner, the last thing you feel like doing is sharing yourself with them,\u2019 explains Kenny.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The solution? Explain how you\u2019re feeling and try to reach a compromise. \u2018You both need to work through those feelings and get to a place where you feel equally cared for,\u2019 says Kenny. And you shouldn\u2019t feel afraid to ask for what you want in bed. \u2018In long-term relationships in particular, people get into a bad habit of not asking for what they want, and then feeling too embarrassed to do that,\u2019 says Kenny. \u2018Try to be open with one another.\u2019 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Find a compromise<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

\u2018If a couple has mismatched libidos, it\u2019s not necessarily the one who wants it less who has the right gauge,\u2019 says Kenny. Evans believes that planning sex can be helpful in this scenario. \u2018It sounds boring, but if you know your partner wants to have sex that night, you can try to feel ready for it. Obviously, you should never have sex that you don\u2019t want to have, but talking about it beforehand means you might be able to play together.\u2019 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you\u2019re still not feeling it, reflect on what\u2019s holding you back. \u2018It might be you\u2019ve got issues with your body,\u2019 says Kenny. In this case, honesty is the best solution. \u2018Often our partners are the first port of call to remind us why we\u2019re so fantastic and beautiful. Express that you don\u2019t feel sexy unless you feel good about your body and talk about what they can do to promote that.\u2019 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Try new things<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

With more time at home, you might decide to try a toy \u2013 not just for solo sex, but to use with a partner. \u2018Start with something small, like a bullet vibrator, because they\u2019re inexpensive and easy to use,\u2019 says Evans. \u2018You can use it on a clitoris or a penis, or on the nipples.\u2019 But choose a toy with a skin-safe material \u2013 rubber and jelly are porous, absorb bacteria and will degrade over time. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fantasies can also help you escape from your routine. \u2018Share stories about what you find exciting with your partner,\u2019 says Ryan. \u2018That can provide stimulation itself, because you\u2019ll create an air of mystery and spontaneity in which lust can thrive.\u2019 Evans also suggests trying a bit of kink. \u2018Using a blindfold can be exciting, as you don\u2019t know what\u2019s coming next and once you\u2019ve been deprived of your sight, it feels like other senses are heightened. You could use a little scarf to blindfold yourself, or your partner, or even tie each other to the bed frame.\u2019<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Whether you\u2019ve had more or less sex with your partner during lockdown, these expert-backed tips will help keep the fire […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":9970,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"fifu_image_url":"","fifu_image_alt":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9969","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"translation":{"provider":"WPGlobus","version":"3.0.0","language":"na","enabled_languages":["en","es","de","fr","ru","hi","ar","tr","it","pt","na"],"languages":{"en":{"title":true,"content":true,"excerpt":false},"es":{"title":true,"content":true,"excerpt":false},"de":{"title":true,"content":true,"excerpt":false},"fr":{"title":true,"content":true,"excerpt":false},"ru":{"title":true,"content":true,"excerpt":false},"hi":{"title":true,"content":true,"excerpt":false},"ar":{"title":true,"content":true,"excerpt":false},"tr":{"title":true,"content":true,"excerpt":false},"it":{"title":true,"content":true,"excerpt":false},"pt":{"title":true,"content":true,"excerpt":false},"na":{"title":false,"content":false,"excerpt":false}}},"featured_img":"https:\/\/fitolympia.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/02\/5f32fedcecb25e779f37a798.jpg","categories_details":[{"id":1,"name":"Uncategorized","count":48,"parent":0}],"tags_details":[],"comment_count":0,"author_name":"Staff","author_img":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/0770ff71d5267ad67c1cefbf36008dc2a2753c332616ff451380094010b0d281?s=96&d=mm&r=g","post_views":7212,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/fitolympia.com\/na\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9969","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/fitolympia.com\/na\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/fitolympia.com\/na\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fitolympia.com\/na\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fitolympia.com\/na\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=9969"}],"version-history":[{"count":11,"href":"https:\/\/fitolympia.com\/na\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9969\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":17714,"href":"https:\/\/fitolympia.com\/na\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9969\/revisions\/17714"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fitolympia.com\/na\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/9970"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/fitolympia.com\/na\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9969"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fitolympia.com\/na\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9969"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fitolympia.com\/na\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9969"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}